Rankings & Irrelevant Comments - week 11

Less than 2 months till Selection Sunday. And if the NCAA increases the Tourney to 96 teams the selection show might just take 2 months. Week 11’s Hopefully Humorous Rankings is below.

Top 10

1.Texas –Avery Bradley was a McDonalds All-American, a Jordan All-American and an ESPN top 100 recruit. Impressive. Yet when he got to Texas he took #0 to remind himself that he hadn’t really accomplished anything. Made me think about putting a zero on my vintage St. Bonaventure University jersey to remind me of my lack of accomplishments. Or I could just look at the emblazoned “St. Bonaventure”.

2.Kansas – I swear that when I watch Cole Aldrich play he always seems to have half his mouth guard hanging out. Though I guess he could just be in desperate need of some major orthodontic work.

3.Kentucky - Coach Cal is credited with perfecting the “dribble drive”. Similarly, I deserve credit for perfecting the “non-dribble drive” during my stellar CYO career. Unfortunately, people didn’t call it the “non-dribble drive”. They just called it traveling.

4.Villanova – Mauphatou Yarou contracted Hepatitis, but has not lost a single pound. Great. So now it’s back to cutting carbs, when I thought all I had to do was get Hepatitis.

5.Syracuse – Basketball Times recently labeled Jim Boeheim as the “Nostradamus of the Hardcourt.” I’d say that makes sense. Much like Nostradamus, Boeheim has duped many people into believing that he knows what he’s talking about.

6.Purdue – The Boilermakers suffered their first loss this past week to Wisconsin. The Badgers might have suffered a bigger loss when Jon Lever, their #1 rebounder and #2 scorer, broke his wrist. Though likely out for the season, he was quoted as saying, “I plan on being as big a part of this team as ever.” And I always thought rebounding and scoring were big parts of a basketball team.

7.Duke – There is an autographed photo of Jay Bilas being auctioned on Duke’s homepage. Yes, that in itself should be sufficiently humorous. But for those of you who have the Doug Gottlieb photo, you can now complete your set of people who have inexplicably parlayed marginal college basketball careers, into jobs as ESPN analysts.

8.Michigan State – I used to love watching hoops with a bunch of buddies. Now, I watch the games with my wife and 2 daughters – a vastly different experience. How so? Well, this past week I was forced to engage in the following debate: Was MSU’s arena, the Breslin Center, named after Jack Breslin a former stellar athlete. Or, was it named after Abigail Breslin, the star of “Kit Kittredge – American Girl.”

9. West Virginia – Joe Mazulla currently starts for the Mountaineers even though he is injured and cannot raise his left arm above his head. Tells you that Mazulla is pretty good. Then again, it might just tell you that his back-up stinks.

10. Tennessee – Last week 4 guys on UT got arrested. The remaining players then won two straight, including a victory over then #1 ranked Kansas. Folks at Tennessee are now convinced that the team is better without those 4 guys. They might even have a shot at winning the Tournament. They just need to have a few more guys get arrested.

As always, next set of rankings coming next Friday.

Take it easy,
Dave